Falling in love is the most wonderful feeling. We all know that. However, there is a slight problem. You need to be with somebody who loves you at the same time. And most importantly, one of you needs to propose the other!
Unfortunately, that doesn’t happen always!
If a woman has decided she wants to get married and that she’s met the right person she is hemmed in on all sides by societal expectations to wait it out. She can vote, drive, become CEO, President, pilot a spacecraft, but the final frontier remains – she cannot propose. There is honor and dignity that is given to a woman when she is pursued and won over. You are worthy of the pursuit. When you read Song of Solomon, you see how he pursues the bride over and over.
But at a point, we have to let tradition be a choice and not a mandate, because while it’s sweet to see a guy so smitten that he asks for marriage, it’s just as lovely to see a woman do it! The world won’t end if the guy makes a first move, sure. But anything that says a woman shouldn’t have the choice (or else they’re weird or lame or desperate) is an issue.
Even today, as we constantly disrupt the status quo, many women tend to think they should be feminine. This means waiting for the guy to ask you on a date, waiting for the guy to buy a drink, waiting for the guy to message you on social sites. Because otherwise, you’re desperate or slutty or pushy.
Of course, not everyone equates these behaviors to something bad. But this all goes back to the construct of gender norms. “We’re just pretty little ladies sitting here waiting on a big strong man to come and whisk us away to our future!”
“And it’s not a leap year!” I hear you cry. And you’d be right. That day, once every four years when it becomes marginally more socially acceptable for a woman to ask the man they want to spend the rest of their life with to do so. Legend has it that “The Ladies’ Privilege,” as it was known then, originated in the fifth century, with an Irish nun later known as St. Brigid. Through her intervention it was decided that on Feb. 29, women would be given the opportunity to pop the question as a way to balance traditional gender roles in a manner not unlike how leap year serves to balance the calendar. The argument is – why wait for a fluke of the Roman calendar?
Women don’t need leap year to step up and ask what they want.
Yeah, I mean, come on, who does not like to be swept off their feet with an extravagant proposal by her guy? But well, you know that you too can take the initiative, right? Speak up, speak out and don’t tell women that they’re lame for proposing. Because that makes you even lamer.
It doesn’t matter whether you are a guy or a girl. Don’t sit back and expect the other person to know it through telepathy. Break the stereotypical image of girls being the passive recipient and why not just tell the guy that you do love him? Take pride in who you are, go ahead and speak your heart out. True love has no parameters that need to be fulfilled.