Does a woman’s honor lie in her vagina????

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– Sweta Mahato

Amidst the hustles and bustles of New Year’s Eve in my neighborhood, I choose to plunge my room in absolute darkness-I turn off the lights and close all the curtains.

I am 18 year old Neha Karki and you might deem my activities to be bizarre and abnormal, however, I am not abnormal; I have been turned into an abnormal girl from a bubbly and enthusiastic girl- a girl who was high with her enthusiasm and dreams has been murdered by this society; yes, my body still exists physically in this world, but this bulk of flesh and bones has no spirit in it, you see.

Why and how I was murdered, you might ask. How the society can be a murderer, you might be wondering. After all, the society is supposed to nurture and develop people. But in my case, the society murdered my spirit and left a lifeless body on this earth to suffer.

My only mistake was that I descended on this earth as a girl- whose honor and chastity was locked in the most vulnerable part of her body- HER VAGINA!!!!

I was raped physically by a guy who tried to quench his male ego and lust by raping my body. However, the story doesn’t end here. Had I shut up and not seek for justice, the rape would have ended. But Alas, I didn’t; I spoke up, thinking I would be bestowed upon justice by the society; all of my expectations were brutally shattered- the society further raped me spiritually as well. The scars were limited merely within my body until I didn’t speak for justice; the society made my spirit bleed and left my soul aloof with deep scars until it turned out to be lifeless and worthless. And today, here I am spiritless and lifeless jotting down my story in my diary amidst plunged darkness whilst the rest of the country jotting down New Year resolutions for brighter years ahead.

Why I am writing all this, you might ask, after all I am a “nobody” and nobody cares what happened with me. Folks, this is not a mere complain letter; my intention of writing this is to ask this HONORABLE SOCIETY the meaning of HONOR.

Was being raped my mistake? Was I responsible for being raped? Why am I forced to live a disgraceful and unloved life while the rapist left free with a mere punishment of a living in jail for a few days? Why am I looked upon as a person who brought shame and dishonor to my family and society?

Why did the society place my honor and chastity in my vagina, making me vulnerable to lose my honor easily???? Why didn’t it place my honor in my soul instead??? Had my honor been measured by my traits and my soul, I wouldn’t have been so vulnerable of losing my honor.

Why didn’t that rapist lose his honor when he ripped off my clothes, left scars on my body and raped me? Where does the honor of that rapist lie? Why isn’t he vulnerable to losing his honor? Just of the fact that he has an enlarged clitoris, is he privileged to feed his egos and lust by ripping off a woman’s clothes?

Dear society, these are my questions to you, before I ingest this poison and let this body free as well- free form this society which has no answers to my questions- free from this patriarchal living hell where being a girl is a crime. This New Year, I have decided to let this mere body free as well, with the hope that in my next birth (if it happens), I descend as a male so that this HONORABLE SOCIETY can no longer place my HONOR in “MY VAGINA”.

 

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31 thoughts on “Does a woman’s honor lie in her vagina????

  1. The bitter truth of the society we are living in. The practice that our community has is baneful. Changes are happening but they haven’t been substantial. The attempt you have made to raise voice against the prevailing double standard is admirable. Keep it up, nice write-up.

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    • Thank you!!! 🙂 I anticipate that such inhuman crimes no longer take place in our society; we got to be the change, in order to make this anticipation come true!! 🙂

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  2. Society exist to help each other and making the wrong thing right but in our context it is opposite. Though people’s thinking is changing but it is changing too slow. I also belong to nobody because I care and the way you raise your voice through this article, hats of to you. You are the inspiration to other girls and I want to tell others to take a step and don’t be afraid to raise your voice against wrong thing.

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  3. Society means to help each other and to make wrong thing right but in our context it is opposite. Though people’s mind set is changing but it is changing too slowly. I belong to nobody because I care and I want to salute you for raising your voice against wrong. You are the Inspiration for other who are afraid to raise voice. Everyone should be capable to raise voice so, that the people who commit crime think twice and our law should be able to give strict punishment.

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  4. This is the world where we are concerned about what is right and wrong according to the society. Your voice is courageous and I am really excited to see your strength build more and more. As you can see more encouraging words here, you would realize that every society is not the same.

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  5. I’m sorry to hear your story, it is indeed a fucked up society! But You’re such a brave woman and its people like you that’ll change the society one step at a time. Thank you for being amazing, standing tall and sharing your story and your strength.

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  6. This is a bitter reality that ironically exits in most of the developing and inderdeveloped nations. The mighty wave of reality about such misconception regarding the girls and women here in a silent but treacherous society-ocean is appreciable. You are genius Sweta. Keep on creating such wave from the nation and areas where such form of injustice are common.

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    • Thank you so much sir for your kind words; it feels so good to hear all these from the person who helped me a lot to improve my reading and writing skills!! You really were very supportive and I still feel obliged for your efforts and inspiring words!! 🙂

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  7. Going through the write up , struck by the story of puja bohara , as the culprits were left behind of ill politicalization of judiciary; good write up keep on !

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  8. Hi sweta,
    First let me say that what you went through no women should go through. No one has the right to force themself upon someone just for the sake of their pleasure.
    I am very saddned by your story but what caught my eye rather than what happened to you was your intrest in harming your self or ending your life. Please please don’t take that approach as your life is more precious than any thing . Although i can imagine your circumstances being a nepali gir and having to live your life with this hanging over your head, it is not the end of the world. Find a support group that can help you get past this and try to live tour lifr in. A positive way.

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    • Mate, I don’t think she was raped.. If you’d read the article again, the second paragraph begins with “I am 18 year old Neha Karki” and the writer is named “Sweta Mahato”. This is not to say that the writer herself might not have been projecting her ordeal through the character but it seems rather unlikely (at least to me). Why? Cause rape is a much much darker tragedy than what she has portrayed through her writing. It is simply impossible to understand how much rape affects your entire being without being a victim (a thing that I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemies). I for one am glad that her writing isn’t that dark for if it were, the implications would have been horrible.

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  9. Society means all of us blend together within some geographic periphery. There are some good ones and other bad ones too. Good ones never commit such sins ;there should be strongly implemented laws and orders that we should punish such murderer for his criminal activities all about lack of good education in our socities. Bravely quoted! !!Hats off to your courageous act. We should bring such evil person in to Tundikhel and should hang in public. Then only somehow such heinous act’s punishment could be justified.

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  10. Sweta I applaud you for having the guts to write about it. You are a brave girl and very courageous. I wish and only wish that all rapists are given a death sentence. I would request all mothers who have boys to teach them to respect all females… Your own mother, sister, friend, acquaintance whoever she is , right from a young age. Only then will society change I guess.

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    • True indeed!! The patriarchal fabric of the society needs to be changed along with the existing gender stereotypes which do no good to our society!! This write-up is a means of sensitizing people about this sensitive issue so that we dare to become a wave of change in our society!! 🙂

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  11. educated peoople doesnt act like educated one , wisedom in them has gone. still thier mind is stucked in those silly rituals, people live in virtual world with fake ego.

    appriciate you for raising voice on such things which which makes people thnk for his morality & humanity.

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  12. Bitter truths written very beautifully, words are hand-picked deliberately and I could sense the reflection of today’s society in your Writing.
    And I would like to reveal the greatest thing about you, ” you are a brave girl,Sweta! ”
    Take a bow !!

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  13. well written and presented..I must say..
    but there ought to be supportive hands that hasn’t been mentioned…
    it’s more like monology..
    at the end it’s all about power distribution…that needs change
    keep writing….

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  14. Bravoo,,bravoo. This is the bold step to bring the positive change in the society.This sort of effort can cause the breakthrough in our society. Keep it up..and as I told u last ma alik she shouldn’t have lost hope..but if we stand in her place,,thikai pani ho..but all I can say is its a wonderful write up..I appreciate Ur work.

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